Rejections are healthy.
I started reflecting about the idea of rejection in end-April 2019. It hit me that I rarely receive rejections in life. So I never understood what it really is, and how to deal with it. But since 2018, I experienced rejections and it felt horrible. It took me some time to understand what rejection was, what it means and how to deal with it.
For reasons I can never understand, I’m receiving a lot of rejections in the past few months. Instead of allowing the rejections to define me, a mistake I made in 2018, I used it as a resource to grow. Rejections are good & healthy, because rejections make you anti-fragile. It feels terrible in the short-run, but I get to learn how to manage it and grow in the long-run.
Through the constantly rejects lately, I’ve grown stronger. It has given me the opportunity to look deeper into myself to strengthen my values as a person. When I feel hurt by rejections, it means (1) I’m basing the value of my self-worth on someone else and (2) I’m no longer in my internal locus of control.
That is not fine for me. I believe that every person is a whole individual, and one should derive self-worth and value internally. That’s how we reach the emotional maturity. If I base my identity and self-worth on someone’s opinions on me, who am I then, without these people to give me my identity? That’s a little silly, isn’t it?
To be rejected is also a sign that tells me I have gone out of my comfort zone to get what I want. It showed me that I took the step forward and allowed myself to be vulnerable. It showed that I have gone out to pursue what I want. Sometimes, the answer is no. And that is okay. It is the opportunity of being rejected that is more valuable than the “no” itself.
Life isn’t “yes” all the time. And that’s okay.
Have courage to be rejected.