Life gets a little too overwhelming and I literally have to repeat to myself “breathe. Lisa. breathe.”. At times, even I get fearful about my own health and well-being. It is not that I am stressing out myself too much, it is perhaps that I have probably reached a stage of enlightenment and maybe just… too sick of it all. All the meaningless associations, meaningless connections, meaningless reality, perhaps.
Since the beginning of the year, I said I wish I could disappear for 2-3 months and come back all ready for success. I told the universe that. And the universe gives you what you truly and desperately seek to achieve. Thankfully, I was given endless opportunities to do just that. It was great.
However, when I got what I want, suddenly my life felt boring. You must understand, the past 4 years of my life is filled with insanity and craziness. The type where I loved every single moment of my life. Everything went even better than planned. It was an unimaginable reality that I could die in. And suddenly, my life became an empty hardworking and kind-of boring reality.
With that being said, my life is still not as boring as most people. I am flying endlessly, partying often, drinking, playing, having fun. It is still insane and crazy for most people’s standards……………. but I am not most people.
However, this is the path I have chosen. This is what I signed up for. This is what I want and hey, I have gotten it. So, this is what I am going to do. After all, it is 3 months of my life, in exchange for 3 more amazing years and maybe even more. 3 months is absolutely nothing compared to the even crazier life I will be having.
We only see what we want to see; results, success, achievements. Sometimes we forget that there is this “shit hole” everyone has to go through to get to the other side. And now, I am going through this shit hole. The universe is kind. The universe constantly sends me lovely reminders through people and platforms. This is not going to be forever. A few months of hard work is nothing compared to the even crazier life that I will be leading.
In the short run, it always seems boring and sad. But hey, when I am older and connect the dots looking back, I will be thankful for every single boring fucking day. You know why? Because my life will never be this boring ever again.
And about boring life. I am beyond confident that my life will be amazing and I will be a multi-millionaire. I just want to help the poorer people to start a livelihood and help everyone attain education. The future is so great and exciting, and I can’t believe I am currently being a fucking whiny bitch, complaining about the amazing wonders in life.
Education, many dreams, opportunities to test out different dreams and just so many beautiful souls around the world. A few months of hard work for a future of not just mine, but to impact and influence a few people. That, yes, that is all that matters.
A little break from my insane life to enable me to be even more insane. Here’s to an amazing future. I can’t wait!
Little happiness, endless gratitude.