Intimacy is really important. Not just relationships, but also between friendships. And I am so grateful for having various intimacy with different people in my life.

6 Types of Intimacy

I found out that there are 6 types of intimacy. Which makes sense, because I can feel intimate with my friends, but not in a way where I want to sleep with them.

Emotional

I think my second favourite intimacy is emotional intimacy. It is where we all can be vulnerable with each other, open ourselves up without judgement, to be who we truly are without any judgement from the other party.

It is where I can cry my heart out and know that the shoulder will be there. It is where I am the listening ear when that is required. It is to be present, and be completely authentic and true to each other.

And I love this intimacy, because I can do it with friends and family, people I truly care so deeply about. I am utterly obsessed and in love with my brilliant friends, and I am more than thankful to be able to have emotional intimacy with them.

To have the safe space to share my personal feelings, to be understood, to have validation from them and to be truly deeply cared for. I do that with my friends too, for I love them so very much!

Experiential

Experiencing things together is a type of intimacy. And I think that explains so much about how and why I made so many amazing friends when I lived abroad. Because we are constantly experiencing things together. That’s why my crazy family will always be family that I chose, because we have experienced so many things together. It is a form of intimacy that money simply cannot buy.

Intellectual

Of course, it goes without saying that intellectual intimacy is really attractive. To have in-depth discussion about various topics and viewpoints. I find that very valuable, and I am glad to have various groups of friends that I can have intellectual conversations with.

Spiritual

This is where we are doing something together, much bigger than ourselves. That is so valuable, to contribute to a bigger community.

Physical

As a person who really loves touches, physical intimacy means so much. It could be holding hands when we sleep, hugs, cuddles, light strokes against the skin. It’s not sexual, it’s really a form of caring. I guess my mum does that to us when we were young, and she still does. So physical touch is really important to me.

Sexual

And of course, sexual intimacy. That is the highest level of intimacy you can be with a person. I don’t know if this is the most important, but sexual intimacy combined with emotional intimacy is really important in a relationship, to me.

I’m glad to be able to be vulnerable to different people, and not just the person I am in a relationship with. I think that is so important. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean that the person is your be-all-end-all. It’s important to have different types of connections and intimacy with others. Not to lose oneself in a relationship. And I’m grateful for what I have. I still think sexual intimacy is the only one you cannot keep distributed, but hey that’s just me. Just some old fashion monogamous relationship!

Keep loving. Because love is the best thing we do.

Love,
L