Dating is like trading BTC on Derbit, with 100x leverage and constrained downsides. I finally get why people like the whole dating phase, the whole “we do everything as a couple but let’s not put a label to things” phase and the whole lust phase. Because let’s be real, it’s fun to enjoy unlimited upside without the downsides.
Dating is the period before a margin call.
Margin call is the moment when your investment (security asset or investment of time and resource towards another person) becomes a tipping point. The point where you either put more investment in (cash or more time and resources) or you lose your asset.
And people like the period before the “what are we” talk in relationships because it means you can still enjoy that 100x leverage with limited downsides. It’s all good. But the reality in financial markets (as is with life) is that it is full of ups and downs. There is no stable market where you can constant upsides without downsides. Even Apple and Tesla had their falls in prices.
I guess I don’t have a point in this post. Just a realisation that dating is like margin call. A tipping point where you decide if you want that investment strong enough to invest more to keep it, or just watch it get taken away. Because some things are not worth it.
Post Margin Call
Call it a bias, but I’d think that when you add more collateral to protect your asset, you’re more likely to value it higher. And I guess that works in relationships too. After that dating phase and you add more investment (time, opening up, intimacy) and turn that into a relationship, you’re likely to value it higher.
A relationship requires so much more. It needs love, real love.
People don’t like love, they like that flittery flirty feeling. They don’t love love – love is sacrificial, love is ferocious, it’s not emotive. Our culture doesn’t love love, it loves the idea of love. It wants the emotion without paying anything for it. It’s ridiculous. — Matt Chandler
And that is why love is difficult. And that’s why not everyone posts collateral when there is margin call.
I hope you find someone who always posts collateral when there’s a margin call.