Relationships I’ve had are always easy. Two people falling in love with each other, equally crazy and passionately in love, yet realistic enough to know that relationship is hard work. It’s easier to be both fools in love and realists in life.

When it comes to relationships and love, I always believed in two things — (1) the instant connection where your gut tells you this is the right person and (2) once you love someone, you will never stop loving them.

And in my experiences, they always hold. It’s been the most wonderful blessing in the world — to love and be loved. So I never experienced the traditional “slow” love-feelings develop over time. Never had the opportunity until now. (Funny, because that was something I thought I ought to experience at least once in my life. And it happened a while later.)

TLDR; I hate it. I still prefer my experiences of love instead.

“Traditional” Relationships

I think of traditional relationships this way — you become friends, get to know each other, slowly start to develop feelings, feel yourself fall in love, be in love, be extremely in love, (maybe) fall out of love, (maybe) letting things go.

On the contrary, the relationships I’ve had are — connection at first sight, be in love, be extremely in love, continue to love even if things don’t work out, never fall out of love.

That being said, I’m grateful for this experience. I know what it is like in the traditional way, I understand why “dating columns” in magazines ask those stupid basic questions and why girls are always talking about relationship issues. Because I’ve finally experienced it. And I know when these conversations exists. Because when feelings come into play and change the dynamics of a relationship, it can get complicated and confusing. (Which is silly because things need not be complicated and confusing.)

The basic premise seems to be lack of communication and not knowing what you want. (What an apt statement for everything in life!)

Confusion

This traditional way of relationship really sucks. It’s time consuming, it’s confusing as hell and I hate it. It feels like it’s all about playing mind games. You can’t get too emotional, can’t get too attached, can’t do this, can’t do that. It has to be neutral and stoic, and continue to be that way.

Uh, that is not a relationship. To me, at least. I love love. I want to be able to experience all the love I feel without reservations. That is the love I know and experience, and I want to continue experiencing that.

Love,
L